Hello ~ hope you’re good!
I thought I’d talk about ‘value’ today.
I think sometimes, that it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking you’re less valuable as you get older, for several reasons.
Roles in your life have changed. It may be perceived that you are needed less. Looks have changed : the svelte body and smooth skin may be looking a little different these days, (but hey! we’ve earned those smile lines). Some dreams may have faded. And sometimes disillusionment may have set in: ‘What happened to my life that was supposed to be so perfect? What happened my script?’
My sister came to stay this weekend and we were philosophising about this over breakfast, and she told me that this is what she uses when she is addressing an audience, to demonstrate how our value is intrinsic and never changes. Maggie has spoken internationally over the last 15 years. This is what she said:
Think of two $100 bills. One is crisp, in great condition and new!
The second has been though the mill. It’s been crushed, crumpled, torn, possibly trodden on, had many encounters with many different people, and it certainly doesn’t look new.
But do you know what, those two bills still have the exact same value. Human beings are the same. The value that was there when they were created always remains the same.
Thanks to my wise Maggie for sharing this simple analogy which I think paints such a clear picture.
Our value is always there, under all of the layers of fiction that we make up about ourselves, on a day to day basis. It’s time to use our imaginations in a different way.
We (yes, me too!) often buy into the limiting self beliefs that we have ‘grown into’. What do I mean by this?
Well, if someone told you when you were five years old that you are kind, guess what? The chances are you are going to act kindly in the next situation where you have an opportunity to put this into practice. And after you practice this, you are going to become kind.
Likewise, if someone says you’re a lazy little piece of works, guess what. You’re going to act it out. At every opportunity you get. You’re subconscious mind will say: ‘What will I do in this situation, oh that’s right, I’m lazy. Better be lazy then!’ And that behaviour will create pathways in your brain that become strengthened, and you are going to become lazy.
You could apply this to any trait that you could think of: incompetent, not good enough, dumb, stupid, slow, cranky, quiet, shy, underserving, not creative … all those labels that have been sometimes said innocently in passing, and sometimes attributed to us with an intention that we’ll never understand.
Needless to say, we have grabbed these allocated traits with both hands and made them our truth.
They’ve got nothing to do with our value. Our value as a human being cannot, and will not ever change. That essence of who we are is indestructible.
How liberating it is to really take this on board: that as much as we’ve bought into who we are, with our set of personality traits and behaviours, there is a brilliant opportunity to discard anything that holds you back, and embrace whatever traits you would like. e.g. ‘I’ve got no confidence’, can be changed into ‘I am quietly confident’, and then ‘I am bursting with happiness and confidence’. I’ve seen it in my Practice.
The power of suggestion is amazing. And documented. It’s documented in your life! You’ve done it before, (as described in the ‘lazy’ scenario), so you know you can do it again, but this time you get to choose your own words.
I’ll be posting a great Tapping Script in the site this week, to get you started with ditching those old limiting self beliefs.
I’d love to hear your thoughts about what you’ve ‘bought into’ in your life. What traits are you still hanging onto that get in your way? Please comment below, I love hearing from you, and share this with a friend if you think they’re doubting their value right now!
Speak soon,
Always here to help,
- My Go To Remedy When Life’s Tough - March 5, 2015
- My Personal Story Of Gratitude - February 22, 2015
- Sense of Purpose – 3 Tips - February 21, 2015
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Ooh! I see you’re using Disqus too! I’ve just put ours on our Blog to test out.
I rather like the idea of being a ‘crumpled tenner!’ (that’s a British colloquialism, BTW).
I think that I may have bought into the fact that I’m unable to ‘do technical’, however, as you know I’ve certainly pushed through that nonsense.
Really enjoying your Blog here Julie!
Thanks Caroline! A crumpled tenner? Never! Thanks for your comments, really love that you’re enjoying the blog. J x
Love the analogy from your sister about the notes still being of the same value. Part of the challenge comes when we don’t se and feel the value within 🙂
Yes, it’s a fictional construct in our head by our ego isn’t it Suzie! Of course we’re all worthy!
You know what came to my mind about the $100 bills? How much fun and adventure and how many different “purchases” the “crumpled” one got to experience. I’d rather be that one than preserved for life. Yup – both are valuable, but I’d rather show the world my value. Great post!
That’s a great way to look at it Jenny!
How very true! I try and be careful with the kids when they’re silly, but praise them when they’re helpful and kind. I have found it helps 😉
Good on you Louise, it all starts with how we speak to our kids!
The image of the crumpled bill is a strong one! I think of my 97 year old mother-in-law. Yes, it is hard for her to perceive her worth and the worth of her life on a daily basis. I think sustaining a sense of self-worth as we get older and older is a worthy task! Babies and children who are well loved know their worth, and we need to extend the same kindness and nurturing to people as they age.
Thanks Judy for your input! J
I love the analogy of the $100 dollar bill, no matter what happens to it, it still has the same value. Thank you for sharing!
I love the $100 analogy! I’ve been thinking a lot about limiting beliefs so I’m looking forward to your next post.
Hey Susan! I’m a little crumpled on the outside these days, but on the inside I’m like a 5 year old on a grand adventure – love that my sister shared this, and thanks for the great feedback, J
Oh yum! I love the reminder that no matter the time that has passed, no matter how I “look” my value is the same – it is up to ME to remember my value. 🙂
Right on baby! Jx
What an odd culture we live in, where we believe that age equates directly to infirmity and lack of ability to contribute. I wonder which came first, this perception or the concept of “retirement?” Thank you for a thought provoking post.
Totally agree Donald! All you have to do is look at someone like Louise Hay to realise what a fiction we’ve been spun 🙂 Thanks for your comments!
Wow, fantastic article! Thanks so much! I am having an EFT session next week with a friend and may actually use this to tap on!
Thanks Laura! Delighted you’ve got EFT in your life. It truly is life altering ! J x
This is such a great analogy! I tend to be hard on myself so I really appreciate reading this and will remind myself of it often 🙂
<3 Mimi
Ah Mimi, behind every fabbo woman is her ‘child’ curled up in foetal position in the corner, doubting away. Ask me how I know 🙂
I absolutely adore the $100 bill analogy. That is something that every single one of us can relate too.
I have heard of tapping and EFT for a long time now but its just been in the past few months that it has become more regularly coming up. I can’t wait to learn more and use it myself 🙂
Brilliant post. Great reminder that our value is in how we see ourselves, often made up from the words we use. I have had enormous transformations and am working on letting go of the lazy worthless mindset that keeps me repeating old patterns with little change. One thing I found is with my heart softer and more open , I have much endearing amusement to soften my crumples.
‘Endearing amusement’ I love that Jen! Thanks for you comments, J
Fabulous post Julie and that $100 bill analogy is one that will stick in the mind – always the best sort 🙂