Hello to you!
Unless you’ve been a total recluse all of your life, you’ll have been hurt by someone, right?
So you find yourself not opening your heart as much to them. You don’t let them ‘in’ as much anymore.
It’s natural that we want to protect ourselves. But don’t let it have the ripple effect of closing down your heart to everyone and become a hard ass:) (that’s not swearing is it?)
It’s ok to take steps to protect yourself from that person, maybe by lowering your expectations of them.
Maybe you have to ease them out of your life altogether.
This is tough if you’re in a situation where you have to see that person because they’re related, or you work with them, but you can do it mentally:) Yes, you can.
The most important thing is to maintain a beautiful open heart as your default.
Here’s 5 things that might help protect your emotional well being when someone hurts you:
1. Remember that pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.
It’s good to acknowledge your feelings, you have a right to them. Allow yourself to feel them. And then decide what next, don’t wallow in it for too long, you don’t want to give that much power to someone over your happiness.
2. Don’t feed the beast.
I know people who are still telling the story of how hurt they were, years later. Once you’ve processed your feelings, let it go. Stop telling your story over and over again. It’s keeping the pain alive.
3. Drop your radar.
By that I mean, our ego minds will verify whatever it is that we take up as as belief. It’s like our ego has a radar constantly searching, always looking for signs to confirm what a mean so and so that person is. Shift your focus from that person who causes pain, and choose to have loving people surrounding you instead. What we focus on expands.
4. Let people own their own behaviour.
Don’t take it on board darling, just don’t! You can talk to some people, or try different tactics until you’re blue in the face. Just be the person that you want to be, and let them own their own neglectful/mean/thoughtless behaviour. They have their reasons, and you’ll never know what they are. Do you really want to spend your beautiful energy trying to fathom an answer to that question?
5. Release them from your heart and mind with love.
Not violence, not hatred. Just let ’em go. Once you stop reacting, their need for pain will have them searching for someone else to latch onto.
Don’t let someone else’s bad ass behaviour make you close your beautiful heart to others. You don’t want to give anyone that much power over your life.
How do you handle the difficult people in your life? What do you do when someone hurts you? Do you remain silent, grin and bear it? Do you remain silent and seethe inside? Do you gradually phase them out of your life?
I’d love to hear your comments, and what has worked for you so please comment below!
With love, as always,
P.S. If you’d like a daily bite size chunk of happiness/inspiration/wisdom, then sign up to receive YOUR free Daily Heart Messages! You can do this be clicking here
I love making them for you. And they’re FREEEEEEE!!! Here’s one, that’s pretty apt for today’s post!
- My Go To Remedy When Life’s Tough - March 5, 2015
- My Personal Story Of Gratitude - February 22, 2015
- Sense of Purpose – 3 Tips - February 21, 2015